The Princes and the Peasants
by elepine4
Summary: Years after graduation Craig and Kenny have become successful business partners in the drug business. They have everything they could ever want. Money, sex, cars, everything! Well, everything except love, but who can you trust when everyone's a gold digger? But what happens when these Casanovas encounter two old friends who couldn't care less about their success and money?
1. Living the High Life

Kenny groaned as sun poured through the satin curtains, a line of light portrayed perfectly across his closed eyes. He rolled away from the light, his back now facing the light and the body of the woman of which his previous night had been occupied with. Although, it was useless fore the light had woken him up and he was finding it difficult to drift back to sleep. Defeated, he sat up in the bed and the blankets slipped off his bare chest to his also naked lap. Kenny stood up and made his way across the room to grab a robe off of the door handle of his closet and slipped it on, looking over at the woman in his bed as he tied it.

Truth be told, he had no idea what her name was or even if she had been in this bed before. Many people made their cycles through his bedroom, so many so that he couldn't even recall faces anymore. It's not like he had to though, all they really wanted was the chance to hopefully woo him and then be bathed in the luxury of his riches. "Gold diggers..." He mumbles lightly under his breath and ran a hand through his blond locks as he walked into the bathroom attached to his bedroom. He did his basic morning routine of combing his hair, brushing his teeth, shaving, and then finally spraying on some cologne. Today was going to be like any other. Work and then later play. Although, could you even really call it play anymore when it's gotten so bland and boring? He exited the bathroom and crossed the room back over to his closet to pull out a freshly ironed, crisped black suit; which he matched it with an orange dress shirt and tie of course. He stole one more glance at the woman in his bed as he tightened his tie, hoping she'd wake up and leave before the maid would come in and kick her out. He shook his head and finally left the room.

"Good morning, you sex demon." Kenny smirked at the nasally voice if his partner Craig Tucker as the raven haired man stepped out of his own room down the long hall. "I could hear her moaning all the way in my own room."

"What can I say? I've become somewhat of a master. How about you Craigy ole boy. You score last night?" Kenny chuckled and slipped his hands into his pockets, his thumbs hanging outside. "Coulda sworn I saw you take a nice red headed honey to your room last night. Was it so good that she passed out and couldn't make a sound?"

Craig rolled his eyes, walking down the wide staircase, having Kenny join him by his side. "Unlike you I don't turn into a wild animal with such easy catches."

"Ahh, it's so mean to call them easy. I prefer to just think that we're _**that**_ good." Kenny lead the way towards the office; he pulled his hands from his pockets and pressed his palms against the large doors, pushing them open.

"It's not us they're interested in, it's the money and you know it. Even if I am as handsome as the come." Craig let a small smirk find it's way to his lips as he walked past Kenny and sat down at his desk. His smirk then faded and Craig let out a sigh, leaning back into the black satin chair at his desk. "Speaking of money, the Moretti family are having some problems with that last shipment so they can't pay the full price."

Kenny's joy changed into mild annoyance and his smile dropped instantly. He plopped down at his own desk and slammed his hands onto it. "Of course they are!" He rolled his eyes. "Those fuckers always try to find a way to jip me out of a full price for a shipment of cocaine. They think that shit is so cheap." Kenny huffed and threw himself back against the chair, having it spin slightly away from the desk. " We should cut all business with them."

"If we did it'd start some sort of drug war, not to mention we'd lose a high amount of customers. It's not worth it, just deal with those asshats cutting off $50,000. It's nothing but pocket money anyways." Craig pulled open the drawer on his desk, pulling a pack of cigarettes from it. He slipped one out of the carton and hung it loosely between his lips. He dropped the carton back into the drawer before fishing out a lighter to light the cancer stick. He set the lighter down, bringing his fingers up to cradle the cigarette between them as he took a long drag; he blew the smoke out of his nose and closed his eyes. "It's not like we don't have the money to spare."

Kenny crossed his arms over his chest and eyed his business partner. "I suppose you're right. It just pisses me off that they think they can so easily get away with something like that." Kenny chewed his inner cheek on annoyance for a few minutes before finally speaking up again. "What's on the agenda for today?"

Craig tapped the ashes of his cigarette into the ashtray on his desk before bringing it back up to his lips. "We just need to take care of a few stocks and manage the imports and outports for today then we'll be done."

Kenny nodded, twisting his chair back to face his desk. He scooted in slightly and settled himself at the computer in front of him. "Easy enough, should have it done with plenty of time to head out to the local club." Kenny snickered to himself and began his work.

**oOo**

Kenny glanced up at the clock, just finishing his work. "Hey Craigy, it's six pm. How about we go out and get a bite to eat somewhere before we hit the real fun."

Craig , who finished his work 30 minutes earlier, groaned. "There's only like five really nice restaurants around here and we've been to them so many times. I'm sick of them."

Kenny stood up from his chair, twisting a bit to crack his back and then set his hands on his hips. "Then let's go somewhere else for once. Just because we're rich doesn't mean we have to eat at five star restaurants every single night you know. I'm kinda in the mood for some cheap steak anyways."

Craig stayed quiet for moment before nodding and standing up. "Should we change into casual clothes then?"

Kenny shook his head. "Nah, then we'd look like one of those poor rednecks, we might even turn into one of them if we dress like them." Kenny smirked. "With all seriousness though, I heard a new restaurant opened up in town, we should go check it out."

Over the years South Park had grown bigger, mostly from the wealth brought in from Kenny and Craigs' business, but also people wanting to 'get a taste of the country'. It had grown from a small mountain town to a decently sized suburb of sorts.

Craig nodded. "Sounds like a plan dude, let's hurry up and get there though. I'm starving."

**oOo**

Kenny pulled the gold encrusted Lamborghini into the parking lot of the restaurant before tucking it into a parking spot between an old rusted truck and some stupid little smart car. The pair undid their seat belts and stepped out of the vehicle. Kenny petted the hood and pressed the button on his keys to lock the doors. "It's okay baby, we won't be long. Don't talk to the filthy peasant cars while I'm gone."

"You've already gone crazy, Kenny." Craig rolled his eyes and crossed the parking lot to the building, trailed behind by Kenny who was currently sending kisses towards his beloved car.

Craig walked up to the greeter at the podium. "Yes, table for two please." The girl's eyes widened, taking a moment to snap out of it and nervously handing Craig a buzzer.

"It's a-a ten m-minute wait, sir." Her smile was a bit shaky and nervous. It wasn't really a surprise to Craig, they had become somewhat famous in the town as their success grew. They also weren't known to eat at places like this very often. He thanked the young girl and walked over to one of the benches along the walls, taking a seat. He was joined by Kenny who sat at his side. The two had some stupid conversation about the car and how unhealthy Kenny's obsession with it was for the next ten minutes as they waited. They were interrupted by the buzzer alerting them that their table was ready for them.

The two walked back over to the greeter and handed her the buzzer. She gave them yet another nervous smile as she lead them to their both, sitting them down with their menus. "Your waiter will be here in a moment. Thank you for choosing us for dinner tonight!" Her last word came out as a small squeak, a blush coming to tint her face a light pink. She tried to laugh it off as she walked away from them.

"I don't know why she had to be so nervous around us." Craig opened up his menu and gazed down at it, looking over the dishes. It wasn't anything near as nice as he was used to.

"It's not often they get to see celebrities." Kenny chucked, looking at his own menu.

"Welcome! My name is Butters and I'll be your waiter tonight." Butters smiled at them, his head tilted slightly. "Can I get you a drink to start off with?"

Kenny and Craig both snapped their eyes away from the menu to look at their old high school friend. "Butters?!"

Butters blinked at them curiously before finally coming to a realization that it was them. "Well gee! Hey guys! I haven't seen you guys since we graduated. I heard you fellas have done really well for yourselves." Butters giggled lightly. "Must be nice to not have to be a waiter."

Kenny grinned happily. Truth be told he'd always admired Butters' cheerfulness. His genuine kindness had gotten Kenny through a lot when he was a kid. Butters was the only one who actually cared to listen to Ken's family issues without ridiculing him for his poorness. "Yeah, you could say we've done pretty well. What about you though? Why are you waiter?"

Butters offered Kenny an apologetic smile. "Gee fellas, I'd love to chat and all, but I need to get to work. Let me get those drinks for you guys."

Kenny was dumbfounded. Usually people would ignore everything else around them to answer his musings. Never before had someone actually thrown his question aside to 'get back to work' or something else equally as unimportant.

Craig, noticing Kenny's silence, was the first to speak up. "I'll have a water with lime and a glass of the fanciest wine this place offers."

Butters scribbled the order down on his little notepad before switching his gaze back to Kenny. "If I know Kenny, he'd want a raspberry lemonade, but I'm sure his tastes have changed since when we were kids." Butters laughed softly, waiting for Kenny to respond.

Kenny thought it was sweet that the cuttle little blonde actually remembered his favorite drink after all these years, a smile finding it's way onto his lips. "You're actually right though Buttercup, get me a raspberry lemonade."

Butters scribbled it down and nodded curtly. "Got it, fellas! I'll be right back with those drinks and to take your order!" Butters walked away from them, taking their order back to the kitchen.

Craig looked at Kenny, who was dreamily gazing towards the direction Butters had just walked away. "Dude, you okay?"

"He's still so adorable after all these years. It's like he doesn't even care that we've become so successful." Kenny sighed happily, supporting his elbow onto the table and settling his chin inside of his palm.

"Honestly, he probably doesn't care. It's Butters." Craig gave up on the conversation and looked back down towards the menu.

Throughout the night Kenny tried to catch Butters in some sort of conversation, only having Butters tell him over and over again that he can't possibly stay and chat while he was on shift. Nearing the ending of the night Kenny, to say the least, was not amused.

"I just want to talk to him a bit you know!" Kenny pushed his empty plate away from him towards the middle of the table and grabbed his lemonade, taking a healthy gulp from it.

Craig, who was still picking at his food, rolled his eyes at his overdramatic friend. "Well, Kenny, he probably cares about this job. Unlike you and me I'm sure he doesn't have a lot of money to blow and probably needs everything he can possibly earn. Stop taking it so personally."

Kenny whined, setting the cup back down. "I just wanna talk to him."

Craig rolled his eyes. "When he comes to give us the check ask what time he gets off and we won't leave until then. Hell, ask if we can all fucking hold hands and skip to his house."

Kenny lit up, grin plastered across his face. "That's a great idea!"

"I'm not fucking holding hands and skipping to his fucking house."

"Not that! But we are going to his house with him after he gets off. We go clubbing every night anyways, it'd be nice to do something new for a change."

Kenny barely noticed as Butters walked back over them with his signature bright smile. "Do you guys want the check now? Maybe a container, Craig?"

"Yeah, that would be great Butters. Listen though," Kenny leaned slightly towards him. "I was wondering what time you get off? You think we could all head back to your place? Maybe catch up?"

"Well, I get off at eight. As for heading to my apartment, I'd have to call Tweek and get his permission. We're rooming together now."

Craig nearly choked on his food, but quickly recovered. "Tweak as in-"

Butters giggled and nodded. "Yes Craig, Tweek Tweak. We moved in together a couple years ago."

Craig looked a bit uneasy, dabbing at his mouth with his napkin. "Are you two just room mates or like...y'know?"

Butters was a taken aback by the question, a blush settling itself on his cheeks. "We're not a couple of anything! Gee, Craig." Butters offered him an awkard smile. "Tweek and I just didn't have enough money to get places on our own so we joined our finances and got the apartment. I'll call him after my shift ends and ask if you guys can come over. I'll go get your check and container." Butters, obviously a bit awkward now, walked away from them.

Kenny leaned his head back and let out loud laughter. "Way to keep cool Craig!" Kenny's laughs mixed with a bit of snorting, his voice mocking that of Craig's as he talked. "Are you guys like y'know?" Kenny continued to howl in laughter, earning a sneer from Craig across the table.

Craig wouldn't admit it out loud, but he used to really admire the spaz. They had become close friends, but nothing more. Craig always felt that Tweek wouldn't be able to take something like a love confession and would probably reject Craig and never speak to him. Probably would think we was an evil robot built by the government to destroy him or something. So, in order to avoid the conflict, Craig kept his feelings one sided until the day they graduated. After that, the two drifted too far apart for Craig to ever get the chance to tell him. Not by Craig's choice really, he just got busy.

"Well, maybe you can use the opprotunity to finally tell him." Kenny, who had finally calmed down, wiped a fake tear from the side of his eye.

"Maybe. Maybe not."


	2. A Challenge

_Holy fuck has it been a year I can explain. I had chapter two done and ready on my other computer but the thing took a shit on me and I lost all my files and it took me awhile to get a new laptop, but here I am. Back and better than ever haha. But no really I'll try to update when I can. Anyways hell yeah let's do this._

Throughout the rest of the night Kenny still tried to use every opportunity shown to flirt with the smaller, fresh faced blonde waiter. Although Butters was, of course, too naïve to notice Kenny's true intentions and merely played each advance off as a joke before getting back to work just like before.

Some time later Craig looked up to see a bent over Kenny checking his reflection in his glass, using his pinky as a makeshift toothbrush. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Does he think I'm ugly?" Kenny's brow furrowed, turning his head side to side to get a better view of his mug. "Why isn't he responding to my advances?"

Craig leaned back in his seat and pinched the bridge of his nose, a habit he had picked up from watching his old classmate Stan over the years. "He's a kid, Kenny. He doesn't understand you're trying to get his number."

"That ass doesn't belong to a kid, Craig. What time is it?" Kenny sat up straight, tired of looking at his morphed reflection.

Craig huffed before leaning slightly to the side and grabbing for his cell phone from his pocket. As he pressed the button to check the time he saw he had several missed texts and calls from several men and women who didn't understand what a one night stand was. Dismissing them he looked at the time. "It's about five minutes to eight."

As if on cue Butters walked up to their table, hands behind his back untying his apron. "My last table just left fellas, you wanna go wait out back for me while I change and call Tweek?"

Kenny and Craig had already been gathering up their belongings before Butters even finished speaking and rose up from the booth. "That sounds like a plan, Buttercup. Don't keep us waiting though." Kenny, once again for maybe the tenth time that night, offered Butters a wink. Butters, who once again didn't get the hint, just nodded an 'okay' and walked away from them.

"Aren't you ever going to learn that your winks aren't working?" Craig slipped on his jacket along with Kenny and walked beside the blonde to the back of the restaurant. The cold air stung on their cheeks, turning them a light shade of red.

"You're talking crazy. They always work."

Craig didn't really say anything back because he knew no matter what he said that Kenny wouldn't believe him. The guy was more in love with himself than anyone else he knew. "Do you think Tweek is going to say no? Like he hates me?"

Kenny just gave Craig a weird look, the corner of his lip twisting up in confusion as he side eyed him. "Um, I don't think he really has a reason to. You're starting to be delusional like him."

Craig glared at Kenny. "Don't call him delusional."

"He kinda is Craig I mean-"

"_I mean _that you better stop it right now before I knock you out." Kenny held his hands up in defense.

"Okay bro, just chill. I won't say another word." Kenny made a zipping lip gestor before locking it and throwing away the key. A cheeky grin now plastered on his face and directed at Craig.

The two turned their head to the sound of a door slamming shut. Butters walked up to them bundled up with some earmuffs and a stereotypically adorable large turquoise scarf. "Hope I didn't make ya fellas wait too long! It sure is chilly out here, huh?"

"Yeah, but I'm a strong man so it's alright. Got plenty of muscle to keep warm." Craig rolled his eyes. "So what'd Tweek say, Buttercup?"

"Oh! He's really excited to see you guys!" Butters was grinning from ear to ear, small lines sculpted almost perfectly on his face. Craig felt a wave of relief roll over him. "Says he hadn't seen Craig since High School so it'll be nice to see him again."

Craig rubbed his neck awkwardly. "I'm excited to see him too."

"Well that's great! Let's get going then!"

"We can take my car." Kenny took out his keys and pressed the button to unlock the door to his precious baby across the parking lot.

"That'd be awful nice, Ken, but I got to take my own car home."

"Did I say my car?" Kenny tossed the keys to Craig who juggled a bit before finally clasping onto them. "I meant Craig's car." Kenny patted Craig's shoulder. "Nice ride huh? I'm sure Craig would like it if I rode with you though instead of with him in his car. Personal space and stuff y'know?"

"Well um, sure? That's alright. I don't mind at all, but um my car isn't all as fancy as that one."

"Doesn't matter. Which one is it? Let's get a move on."

"It's that one over there" Butters pointed to a run down, rusty old Saturn that looked as if it were going to fall apart any moment. The ugly dark green paint was chipping off and there was duct tape holding the bumper on. Not exactly a pretty sight.

Craig laughed, returning the pat Kenny gave him earlier. "Well, I guess I'll see you there, man." Craig walked away to the nicer car, laughing the whole way.

"I'm sorry if you don't like it, Ken." Butters eyes lowered to the ground as he nervously played with the sleeve of his shirt. "I just don't have all that much money."

Kenny, who at first had to admit he almost thought of bailing and riding with Craig instead, fell victim to the almost evilly cute blonde in front of him.

"Awe Butters, it's okay. I'm sure it's a very um… reliable vehicle?"

"It gets me where I need to go I guess." Butters shrugged and a sheepish smile grew on his face. "Well c'mon, like you said let's get a move on. I'm freezing my gosh darn booty off out here." Butters began walking to the car, Kenny trailing behind just to get a look at Butter's swaying hips.

"We wouldn't want that to happen, now would we?"

Butters car wasn't anything all that special. The leather of the seats was growing weak and was decorated with several small holes. The cloth covering the roof of the car had come off, revealing orange Styrofoam type substance in its place. Which itself had handprints and smiley faces drawn into it. Kenny had to admit it made the car kind of cute.

Kenny spoke up over Uptown Funk which had been playing on the radio. "Butters if you ever want a new car you can just tell me. I have the money to buy you a new one."

Butters merely glanced at Kenny before focusing back on the road. "I'd never ask you to do that for me."

"Why not?" Other people did it all the time. Lovers, friends, family, etc. People weren't usually shy about asking Kenny for jewelry or cars and he didn't mind giving it to them. He loved having the money to do things like that.

"Well, for one, I don't need it. This car runs fine and the heater works."

"Well sure you don't need one, but don't you want one?"

Butters shrugged. "Everybody likes material things to an extent I think and yeah it'd be nice, but I'm alright with just this. Even then, material things aren't the most important thing out there."

Kenny had lived his whole childhood being poor and wasn't happy until he finally had become rich. He felt like his material things brought him happiness. Money could buy anything he wanted. "What's something more important that money can't buy?"

Butters stayed silent for a second, filling the car with nothing except the words of Maroon 5's latest hit, before finally answering the question. "Love."

Kenny stiffened in his seat as Butters turned into parking garage and parked the car.

"Well, here we are, Ken." Butters undid his seatbelt and got out of the car, leaving behind Kenny who sat in his seat for a few seconds longer before slowly following Butters' lead.

They had met up with Craig in the parking lot before going up to the apartment. Craig noticed Kenny seemed a bit troubled, giving him a small nudge which knocked Kenny out of his thoughts and back to normal. He wasted no time in giving Craig a shove back.

Butters fumbled for his keys in his pocket once they got to the door, freezing and looking up when hearing the door being unlocked and opened by his blonde roommate who was standing on the other side. "You guys s-sure took your time g-getting here."

Craig took notice that Tweek's hair had grown a bit fuller since they were teens and seemed to have had an attempt to have been combed through. He still had the same fashion sense, but his buttons seemed to be all nice and in order now. He didn't look as if he was twitchy anymore either. Craig was a bit disappointed at that. The only thing that still remained was a bit of stuttering and his nervousness (obvious through the way Tweek was looking around the hall nervously.)

"We didn't take that long. You're just excited huh?" Butters giggled as Tweek began to sputter in his defense, a light pink decorating his cheeks. "I-I'm not THAT excited! I mean a little, but um- AH!" Tweek reached up and grabbed his locks.

'There it is.' Craig thought as he smiled to himself.

"I'm just kiddin' Tweek." Butters walked into their apartment, peeling off articles of his snow gear along the way. "Come on in fellas. It probably ain't as big and nice as you're used to, but it's warm and comfy."

Butters was right. The apartment wasn't very big at all. One bedroom which Tweek and Butters shared. No worries though because they had two separate beds.

The bathroom was nothing to brag about either. Cramped with nothing but the bare necessities and some drug store soaps and shampoos. The living room was a bit bigger but was furnished with nothing more than a medium sized couch and an older version television which were separated by a chipped wooden coffee table. The kitchen smelled off coffee and sweets, which honestly surprised neither Craig nor Kenny.

Although it was small, Kenny thought it had a comfortable and warm feeling just like Butters had said. Something different from his large mansion.

Craig and Kenny took a seat on the couch with Tweek pressed between them. Craig was a bit awkward and unable to grow some balls to actually start up a conversation so Kenny did it instead.

"I'll get us some snacks." Butters left the three of them and went to the kitchen.

"So Tweekers," Kenny started, leaning back in the less than comfy couch. "What you doing now a days?"

Tweek fumbled with the bottom of his shirt nervously, hands shaking as he avoided eye contact with the both of them and focused on the tan carpeted floor. Craig on the other hand couldn't take his eyes off of him. "L-Like what do you mean?"

"I mean like a job. Butters is a waiter, so what do you do?"

"Oh I um… work at a local grocery s-store. Check out." Tweek's voice got a little quieter. "It doesn't pay too much though."

"I would have thought you'd get a job with some coffee involved honestly."

"I've cut back a lot. I still d-drink it, but definitely not as much. It'd be hard for me to control my urges if I was around it a-all the time."

Kenny nodded. "That's true."

Craig was surprised to hear that the blonde had cut off something he loved so much when he was younger and now cut into the conversation without a second thought. "Why?"

Tweek ran a tongue over his bottom lip nervously and for the first time that night looked up and met eyes with Craig. "Well I guess I got tired of everyone making fun of me and calling me a freak. Well th-that and no place would hire me because of how twitchy and weird I was. The b-bills needed to be paid y'know?"

Craig only now just noticed how cold and almost sad Tweek's eyes looked in that moment. They craved love and nurturing. Craig nearly kicked himself for not being there. Being there to kick anyone's ass who dared to call Tweek a freak. To defend him. Why should he have to change the way he was for anyone? Craig thought he was perfect. If Craig were around he would have given Tweek the money so he wouldn't have had to worry about getting a job and impressing some fat assholes just to get hired.

"Tweek," Craig reached forward to clutch Tweek's hands in his, causing the blonde to jump in surprise. Kenny at this point felt it was going to get very awkward if he stayed so he wasted no time in standing up and booking it to join a pleasantly surprised Butters in the kitchen.

"If you want I don't mind giving you money." Craig's eyes were serious as he stared into Tweek's own. "You can quit your shitty job and drink all the damn coffee you want."

Tweek stayed quiet before gently pulling his hands back from Craig's. "Now w-why would I wanna do something like that?"

"Huh?"

"This is good for me Craig. I'm getting healthier this way. It's h-helping me break off from an unhealthy addiction." Craig didn't know what to say, but Tweek kept talking. "I don't need you helping support my addiction and I don't w-wanna take money from you for no reason either."

Craig tried to choke out words in a response. Tweek was right. Craig ran his hands over his face. How stupid could he be? "Tweek I'm sorry. God I'm a fucking idiot I just thought-"

Craig felt Tweek's hands on his shoulder and back in a comforting gesture. "D-don't beat yourself up and insult yourself. Y-you're not an idiot, you just wanted to h-help me out with something you thought I wanted."

Craig peeked at Tweek. A blonde angel. "I can still give you money though."

"Craig, I don't need it. H-honestly."

"Tell me what I can do for you?" Craig asked almost desperately, but managed to hide it enough to where it didn't break his 'cool' composure. Tweek wouldn't say it out loud, but he knew Craig enough to read him pretty well. Craig knew it too which is probably why he was too comfortable and almost let his guard down already.

"Well you c-can come to visit me more. I k-kinda miss being friends with you."

"…Just that?"

"Do you not w-want to?" Tweek began to look a little panicked.

"No no. That's not what I meant at all. I just…" He paused. "You don't want me to buy anything for you?"

"I don't need you to buy anything for me, Craig. Just be my friend again." Tweek bit his bottom lip, looking up at the taller black haired man on the couch next to him. Craig thought Tweek's large coffee brown eyes reminded him of a guinea pig. A really cute eyed guinea pig.

Craig never had anyone ask him for just his friendship in such a long time. "You got it, Tweekers." And with that he gave the blonde his first genuine smile of the night.

"You should spend the n-night." Tweek offered cautiously. "We can sleep out here and watch old VCR tapes like when we were still kids."

Craig laughed. "You still own a VCR player?" Tweek gave him a playful, very weak, slap on his arm which just made Craig laugh even harder. He missed this. This was just pure fun that wasn't based on his incomes. It was a comfortable change.

Meanwhile in the Kitchen Kenny sat up on the counter as he watched Butters, adorned with a pink hello kitty apron, remove some jalapeno poppers from the oven. It was almost nostalgic as he remembered all those nights he would sneak out when Butters parents weren't home and his friend would make him food and listen to Kenny complain about his family as he ate whatever snack Butters cared to make for him. He was the only one who ever really cared to listen and care for what Kenny had to say.

They used to be pretty close friends until Kenny took off and got rich.

"If you came over to my place I'd have my cooks make you a feast like you never had before."

It was around now that Butters had finally started to catch on to Kenny's lines. He may be slow, but he wasn't completely ignorant. "I'm sure they would, but…"Picking up a popper he stuffed it into Kenny's mouth. "These are pretty tasty too."

Kenny shrieked while opening his mouth and dropping the hot popper into his palm and tossed it into the trash before he fanned his tongue.

"Too spicy?"

"No!" Kenny spoke with his tongue out, a pout on his face directed to the other blonde in the room. "Hot. It burnt my tongue."

"Oops! Sorry Ken. I'll fix that for ya. Just a sec." Butters giggled mischievously as walked to the cupboard.

"You can fix burnt tongues?"

"Mhm. It's a trick my mom taught me." Butters reached for the sugar and carried it back to Kenny. "Stick out your tongue for me please.

Kenny did as told and Butters reached in the bag for some of the sugar before placing it onto Kenny's injured tongue. "How's it feel?"

Kenny smacked his lips a bit as he moved his tongue around his mouth to distribute the sugar all over his tongue."Wow! It's like…healed?! How'd you do that?"

"Um… with the sugar?" He laughed.

"Nah." Kenny beamed at him. "You got to be like a healing angel or something with some magical healing powers."

"Well, not the last time I checked." Butters walked back across the room to put the sugar away.

"I should hire you as my personal nurse. You'd get paid a lot more and you can live in my big mansion."

Butters sighed, catching Kenny off guard. "You sure do like to brag about your money, don't cha?"

In shock, Kenny barely knew how to respond. "Is that a bad thing?"

"It's something I don't particularly care about honestly."

"You're not impressed?"

"It's not that it's not impressive Kenny, I told you earlier that there's just more important things than money and material things."

"…Like love?"

"Exactly."

"I can give you that." Kenny replied in a serious tone and hopped down from the counter.

Butters turned suddenly on his heel, surprised as he looked at the other blonde who crossed the room over to him. "Huh?"

"I can give you love too. Love and money." Kenny reached to set his hands on Butters waist.

Butters just looked at him before slowly lowering hands to take Kenny's own off of his hips. "You still just don't get it, Ken."

Kenny looked concerned at his response. "Get what? I said I'd give you my love too."

"Well for one, you don't love me. It's lust. Second, you still just don't get it." Butters sighed disappointed, going to pick up the poppers. "Maybe…" Butters clicked his tongue. "If you come to understand I'll _possibly_ fall for you and take you up on that offer." An almost playfully naughty grin found its way onto Butters lips. It might be fun to make a little game out of this.

Kenny stepped closer. "Understand what? Tell me."

"Figure it out yourself. It's a challenge." Butters just gave him a playful wink and carried the tray of food out to Craig and Tweek in the living room, leaving Kenny behind.

Kenny just stood dumbfounded in the middle of the kitchen, completely confused as he tried extremely hard to understand what the hell Butters had meant.


	3. You Have To Get Hurt To Learn

_(sorry about the long waits guys. It's because of school and work and I find myself usually only having time to update on breaks. But yeah honestly I'm sorry. I intend to finish this story so I won't abandon it. During summer I'll try my best to update frequently.__**also don't forget to review it's really good motivation or me to update!)**_

Kenny tipped back in his chair, a cigarette hanging from between his lips as he gazed at the ceiling. Usually Kenny was really good about getting his work done on time if not early, but today he was running slightly behind schedule. He was distracted with thoughts and ideas flying around his mind as he was still trying to figure out what Butters had meant the night before.

He sat back up in his chair once again and removed the cigarette from his mouth to put it out in the ash tray. He glanced up and through the rising smoke of his now dull cigarette he could see Craig too was unusually distracted from his work as well.

"You shouldn't text while we're working y'know." Craig just flipped him off as he kept his eyes on the screen of his smart phone.

"You're not exactly speeding through your work either, asshole."

Kenny's nose crinkled in slight annoyance. "At least I don't look like a mess."

"I didn't have time this morning at Tweek's place to style my hair before I left." At this the corners of Kenny's lips turned up into an almost devious smile.

"With that huge lump of bedhead I'm gonna guess that the sex was pretty great." Without missing a beat Craig pinched up the nearest item, which happened to be a notepad, and chucked straight at Kenny's face. A loud smacking sound was heard on the other side of the room. "What the FUCK, Craig!" Kenny cried as he keeled forward and clutches his hands onto his face.

"We didn't have sex." Craig was mumbling slightly, but was still trying extremely hard to hide any form of embarrassment he was feeling. "I just stayed the night and we watched old movies on his VCR."

"They still own a VCR? Those poor souls don't know the true magic of blu ray." Kenny placed a hand over his heart and gazed out the window in a gesture as if pitying Tweek and Butters for their lack of modern entertainment.

"I actually had a lot of fun. We watched Monsters Inc and we were laughing and it was a lot of fun." Craig would have liked to mention the small bit of cuddling him and Tweek participated in, especially as they slept, but he felt it best to leave that part out.

"Awe that's so sweet. Did he suck your dick too?" And that's exactly why.

"Fuck off, Mccormick. We didn't do anything like that. There's more to life than huge flat screens tvs and sex."

"Sounds like a boring world."

"Maybe that's why Butters won't date you."

Craig even had to admit that was a low blow and he could tell because instead of some smart ass remark, Kenny just stayed silent. He seemed to almost deflate in his seat as a look of defeat and disappointment crossed his face. Time passed before Kenny began speaking very softly. "Y'know… all my life I've been poor and it sucked. It sucked really fucking bad." Kenny started to get a bit louder as his sentence went on. "Then he has the nerve to tell me money doesn't matter. I'll show him though."

"Show him what?"

"How great money can be! I'll make him fall for money. Fall for me."

"Dude I don't think-"

"I'll make him see how great it is. I'll shower him with gifts and ever luxury he could ever think of. I'll take him on dates to Paris and buy him diamond jewelry. Hell I'll buy him a _HOUSE_, Craig, a motherfuckin' house!"

Craig at this point just gave up and thought maybe Kenny should just fuck up and learn the lesson on his own. That and Craig felt that this whole experience would be entertaining to watch. "I'm meeting Tweek later tonight at his place before we go out. Maybe you could come along and chill with Butters for the night."

"Awe, your guys' first date?"

"It's not a date, asshole. We're going to the pet store to look at guinea pigs." Craig still adored the fluffy creatures, but couldn't bring himself to buy one. He would feel as though he was replacing his beloved Stripe, God rest his soul, and that would just make him feel guilty.

"That is the lamest date I've ever heard of."

"Well I'm sorry I don't feel like I have to take him to Paris so we can make out on the Eiffel Tower like _some people_…AND IT'S NOT A DATE!"

**oOo**

Later that night the two friends arrived at the apartment. Craig was uncommonly underdressed in a basic hoodie in jeans. It looked good on him either way. Some would even argue that casual clothing looked better on him than his usual suit and tie combo. Although Kenny felt that if you were rich you should wear clothing that made it pretty obvious.

Tweek answered the door. "H-Hey guys. B-Butters will be h-home after- nggh work. You can j-just hang out for a little b-bit, Kenny. I mean if th-that's okay with you? " Craig grinned to himself as he watched the adorable spaz.

"Sounds good to me. You guys got anything good in the fridge?" Kenny pushed past Tweek into the small apartment and went directly towards the kitchen.

Tweek just ignored it and walked out of the apartment, but he made sure to check the lock several times before he and Craig finally left. Tweek knew that his entire kitchen would be bare by the time Butters would even return home. Something that never changed about Kenny was his appetite. When they were kids Kenny was always hungry, not even because he was too poor to afford food, but damn that kid could eat. He'd probably eat until he exploded if it were possible. Tweek used to compare it dogs who will eat as much human food as they possibly can. Relentlessly until they end up puking, but soon go back to eating again.

Kenny managed to wrap his arms around several items of snacks and beverages. He struggled not to drop the items as he turned and bumped his hip on the fridge door to close it. Once the fridge was closed he ventured into the living room and began snacking as he waited for Butters to return home. In a matter of minutes the dirty blonde was sprawled out across the couch. He was currently transfixed on an episode of . Kenny wasn't particularly a fan of the show considering it reminded him a lot of his redneck childhood, but Tweek and Butters lacked Cable so this was the best option at the moment. He has to admit that there is the slightest bit of entertainment watching some trailer trash yell at some guy about baby daddies and such.

Kenny shot up when he heard the front door open and close. A smile snuck onto his lips as he heard the sound of Butters soft mumbling in the distance. "So fricken cold out there. Jeez." Butters was still unwrapping his scarf when he came into the living room to join Kenny. "Sorry bout makin' you wait so long, Ken. My last table just would not leave." Butters cheeks were a deep red from the blistering cold he was battling with just minutes before and he was still shivering lightly.

"Nah its fine. It hasn't even been that long. You look pretty cold there, Buttercup. Why not come over here and let me warm ya up a bit?" Kenny opened his arms in a gesture for Butters to come over while accompanying it with bouncing his brows as a huge shit-eating grin found itself on his face.

Butters leaned against the arch between the living room and hallway and gave Kenny look as if to say silent 'seriously?'. "I see you've been eating all our food. Make sure there's no crumbs or stains on the couch or so help me, I will kick your butt, okay?"

Kenny lifted a hand to his mouth and quickly turned his head away in the best attempt her could manage to mask his giggling

"Don't laugh at me! I can be pretty scary when it comes to my house being messy, mister!"

Butters stuck his nose up and made a quick turn on his heel, ignoring the immature blonde man giggling away like school girl on his couch as he made his way to the direction of the bedroom.

"I'm sorry Buttercup!" another small giggle. "I didn't mean it c'mon. Where ya going?" and another.

"I'm just changin' out of my works clothes is all. Use this time to clean up those crumbs, mister!" Butters called from the other end of the apartment before disappearing into his room.

Kenny couldn't help but to roll his eyes and smile. "Yeah yeah. I got it." He said in a sarcastic tone, but none the less made a once over at his surroundings to make sure there weren't any actual crumbs to be picked up. He'd hate to wake the evil monster that had burrowed itself deep within Butters soul, only to be awoken if someone spilt a beverage or worse… dropped a crumb onto his precious furniture.

While scanning the area he noticed a picture on the stand next to the couch. He leaned over to snatch it from its place and examine it more closely. It was a picture of Butters and Tweek at some local amusement park. Butters had his arm wrapped around Tweek's shoulder as he grinned so hard his eyes were almost squinted completely shut. His free hand was holding a bag of cotton candy, but most of it was stuck to various areas of his face instead of being in the bag. Tweek looked relaxed and seemed to be having fun as well, which with Tweek's personality was a little surprising to see at a place such as an amusement park with so many 'dangerous' rides that could possibly kill you and a lot of people walking around to possibly steal you and sell you as a sex slave . They looked as if they were in a state of utter joy and bliss. Kenny kind of wished he had been there with them to share an experience like that. It's been awhile since Kenny's really had fun like the two appeared to have had on that day, however long ago it was.

Kenny didn't notice that a large dorky smile had grown on his face as he stared at the picture. Seeing Butters so happy was managing to put himself in his own state of happiness. It was slightly strange that someone else being happy could have such an influence on Kenny's personal feelings Maybe this is what you call genuine caring for another person? Just the smile alone was enough to wipe away any negative feeling Kenny may have had.

Even though Kenny didn't realize how absolutely nerdy he looked, Butters sure did. Instead of disturbing the moment, Butters decided to let Kenny have his and just leaned on the arch frame to watch him.

After about a minute or so Butters felt as if the moment had lasted long enough and finally decided to speak up. "That was a couple years ago." Kenny jumped in surprise as his head shot up to look at the other blonde. A subtle pink blush forming on his cheeks as Butters crossed the room and sat down next to him on the couch. "At first Tweek was really nervous so we started out on slow child rides, but eventually he built up enough confidence to go on a roller coaster. I had to hold his hand and soothe him the whole time we were in line and after the ride he started to cry and have a panic attack." Butters lifted a hand over his mouth as he laughed. "He was fine again after we went on the spinning swing ride again though."

At this point Kenny was laughing along with the story too. He couldn't help but to Imagine Tweek clinging onto Butters side during the whole wait in line to get on the ride. Kenny could barely see the picture through his squinted eyes as he laughed. "Well look at you! More cotton candy made it onto your face than into your mouth it seems."

Butters was now laughing so hard he had to lean against Kenny's side and look at the picture too. "That stuff is hard to control! I couldn't help it! It made my whole face _reeeeally _sweet though!"

Kenny's laughter slowly began dying down into a chuckle as he lifting his arm to wrap around Butters and tugged him a little bit closer as the smaller blonder continued to shake with laughter. "All of you is always sweet though."

Butters laughter slowly began trailing off as well as he glanced up at Kenny. Their eyes connected as now only a smile was left on both their faces followed by very light giggles which soon began to quiet down as well as the two began drawing closer. The corners of their mouths came down from their smiles and connected instead, filling the room with silence aside from noise of the two adjusting themselves on the couch.

Butters tilted his head slightly to the side as Kenny moved in to deepen the kiss. Kenny had kissed many people in the past, and even that was understatement, but none were quite like this. He had maybe felt this passion and this spark before, but never together and absolutely never laced with the happiness that was twisting around in his stomach.

Kenny had gently moved to lay Butters down on his back against the couch, hands pressed on either side of his head as Kenny hovered over Butters. Butters hands had come up and found themselves tangled in Kenny's dirty blonde locks. The ever so light jerking movements that tugged at Kenny's hair almost set him wild.

Kenny pulled back to catch his breath, and allow Butters to have a breather as well, before going back down to nip at Butter's lower lip. He spoke in a quiet hiss through his teeth. "Be mine."

Butters seemed to freeze below him before lifting a shaky hand to Kenny's chest. Butters gently pushes Kenny up as he sat up, having Kenny straddling over Butter's lower half with a pained expression on his face. "I'm sorry, Ken." Butters couldn't bring himself to look at Kenny and decided to look towards the other half of the room instead. "I just don't think you really-"

"That I don't what?!" Even though Butters wasn't looking directly at Kenny, he could feel the glare burning at his skin as Kenny's voice began to shake with anger and hurt. "I can provide for you! I can buy you anything you want! I can give you everything you want. There's nothing that I can't do for you!"

Butters sighed and shut his eyes as his eyebrows knit in a slight irritation. "I just don't think you really understand what I meant yet. That remark there kinda proved that."

"I can't understand if you won't tell me!"

"If I tell you then you won't truly understand it! You have to figure it out for yourself." By the point Butters was now shooting a glare back at Kenny. "For now I think." He paused, trying to hide the shake in his voice. "I think you should go home."

Kenny felt as though someone has stabbed him straight in the heart as his face twisted in pain. He quickly shot up from the couch and grabbed his things before leaving the apartment, slamming the door as hard as he could possibly manage. Kenny actually had to pause and turn to make sure the door hadn't fallen off its hinges before he finally began stomping down the stairs to his car.

Butters sat there on his couch where he was now hugging his knees against his chest. It wasn't as though he disliked Kenny, but he knew that if Kenny truly did like him that this would end up being fine. Besides, Kenny needs this eye opener in his life.

Butters heard the door open and shut again. He was slightly disappointed to see Tweek enter instead of Kenny. "W-Why is Kenny throwing a f-fit down in the parking lot? Craig is down there r-right now trying to calm him- nggh down. What happened?"

Butters ran a hand through his own hair. "We kissed and he asked me to his 'be his' and stuff and I said no."

"Huh? Why'd you go and do that?! No wonder he's so t-ticked off…"

"He thinks that my happiness and love can be bargained for with things like new houses and material items. I just want him to realize that having people date him for those reasons is wrong."

"Don't you think leaving him in the d-dark to figure it out on his own is a little…c-cruel? You're not even giving him a h-hint."

"If I tell him myself he won't actually get it."

"S-still I don't think th-this is the most e-effective method."

Butters felt his lower lip tighten into a slight pout. Tweek had a point. How could Kenny begin to understand without a little push? "What do you suggest I do then?"

"I'm not really good at planning th-things like that. You should ask Craig h-he's pretty close with Kenny after all so he'd probably h-have a better plan than a-anything I can come up with."

Butters felt a playful grin form on his face. "I'm sure your _boyfriend _will have a great plan."

Tweek blushed and began to freak out a bit while lifting a hand trembling hand to cover his blushing face. "He's not m-my boyfriend. Shut up. We're not in m-middle school so you d-don't need to make jokes like that."

Butters giggled a bit as he watched Tweek blush and freak out. "If we're supposed to be so mature why are you getting so embarrassed about me saying it."

"I'M N-NOT EMABRRASED!"

"Embarrassed about what?" Tweek screamed and turned to leap backwards into the living room when he heard Craig's voice. He fell right onto his ass and clutches tightly onto his chest. Craig kneeled down to rub Tweek's back in order to try and calm Tweek's current twitching fit (and minor heart attack). "Sorry about that Tweekums."

Butters scoffed jokingly and arched an eyebrow at Craig. "Tweekums?"

Craig just narrowed his eyes at Butters, but ignored the comment otherwise. "Kenny told me about what happened. Man I thought he was gonna pass out he was so mad."

"I just want him to understand I don't want his gosh darn money."

"Kenny is a pretty thick headed guy."

"We were actually just talking about how you should come up with a plan to help me get Kenny to realize it actually. Tweek suggested it himself."

Craig glanced down at Tweek who currently had his faced buried into Craig's side as he was taking deep breaths to calm down. "Why should I do that?"

"Tweek would be awfully impressed if you successfully made a plan to help me and Kenny out, right Tweek?"

"Gah!"

Butters almost spotted Craig's eyes twinkle at the thought of Tweek being impressed with him. What a dork. Butters couldn't figure out why these two couldn't just 'grow some balls' and confess to each other already, but everyone takes things at their own pace.

Craig grunted lightly. "Fine. I'll help. Only because I have nothing else going on and playing a trick on Kenny could provide a little entertainment."

"Woah, I never said anything about playing tricks."

"Kenny won't understand if you continue playing nice though. A rough push won't hurt him. Stop being pussy."

"But playing a trick on him might hurt him in some way. I want Kenny to learn something, but I sure as heck don't want to hurt him."

"Sometimes people need to be hurt so they can learn, Butters."

Butters grew quiet. His gaze shifted from Craig then to the wall and finally met with the ground. "I um" He sighed. "I guess you have a point, but I'd still feel pretty rotten about it." Butters pouted and kicked at the ground.

"Trust me." Craig patted his own chest. "He'll be hella thankful to me and you once you're riding his dick down the aisle."

A silence filled the room as Craig waited for a reply.

"You're lucky I need you for this plan."

"Sure am. You should probably let me stay the night so we can plan things out."

Butters crossed his arms over his chest and pivoted.

Craig groaned. "Okay and I also don't want to go home to Mr. Grumpypants, alright?" That wasn't a lie, but Craig left out the part that his main reason for wanting to stay the night was Tweek. Craig was pretty sure Butters already knew that though, even without him saying it.

Butters sighed. "Fine. Fine. I suppose you and Tweek can share the couch."

"Huh? Why the hell do we have to be on the couch?"

"Because if I let you guys sleep in the bedroom there might be some funny business and that's not happening. Nuh-ope. Not on my watch. If you sleep on the couch you guys are least likely to get all funny."

"What are we? 14 years old?"

"We're not g-gonna do that st-stuff anyw-ways! Gah!"

Craig couldn't help to feel the slightest twinge of disappointment.

"Mhm sure. Well, wherever you two sleep, just go to bed soon. I want to be up bright and early to start planning."

Craig grinned. "And you seemed so weary to play a trick on him before."

"Go to bed, Tucker."


End file.
